Time to get the sponsors in - but first let's get them out!

Well, I've not had a bad week of training to get ready for my visit to Livingstone's Pit tomorrow morning. Tuesday saw me do a 16 mile training run - only slight problem was I didn't actually get very far. The chuffing weather we've been having around Ron Towers of late made it impossible to train outdoors - so I had to do 16 miles on the flipping treadmill - now is that dedication or what?

I've been working hard this week on getting my sponsorship proposal ready and I've already got a short-list of companies that I'll be offering myself to. The choice of company is obviously a fairly important decision for me to make. Not only will I be carrying the responsibility of their brands with me - but when I stand on that podium with the Gold Medal around my neck I want to make sure that those commercial enterprises who are associated with me will not tarnish the medal I've worked so hard to get.

So, first off, I have compiled a short list of those companies and organisations that I want nothing to do with. These companies will not have their logo or names within a hundred yards of this kiddie. Just to make sure that they don't see this as sour grapes come 2012, and to avoid any unpleasant or embarrassing scenes in the aftermath of my Gold Medal triumph, I'm writing to the Chief Executives of these organisations now to make sure they understand my reasons for banning them. My 'no-way-Jose' companies are:

Bernard Matthews - for obvious reasons. Poor media relations, low brand integrity and shit meat.
EDF Energy. They might sponsor everything else that moves - but not this kiddie. They're French. And you can stick on this list Moet & Chandon, Perrier and Burtons Cakes (they make those French Fondant Fancies) as well!
Transport for London - you watch these bunch of corduroy-shoe-wearing, no-car-driving, hermaphrodites jump on the bandwagon just as soon as they hear the Olympics are coming to their town. Well they make my life a nightmare every time I visit Livingstone's Pit - so this is, quite honestly, just pay back time.
Coca Cola - yes, sorry chaps. You might think you'll have the pick of the endorsements. But not this kiddie here. I've got a conscience and when I heard of the conditions that Coca-Cola workers have to work in their sweatshop labour houses in Chelmsford I was horrified. Did you know that some of their workers have to do twelve hour shifts for as little as £14 an hour? It's exploitation.
British Telecom - I'm going to get a tad political here (but, just because I'm famous doesn't mean I can't have opinions). How on earth have we come to a position where our own phone company employs staff in India - and kicks our own boys and girls over here out of a job? My mate Buttocks was made redundant after 25 years loyal service to BT - so this one's for you Buttocks!
Morrison’s Supermarkets. They're Yorkshire. Nuff said.
Smart Cars. They just look stupid and I'm not going on no victory parade in an open top Smart Car. I want a bus like the Ashes team had.
Campbell’s Meatballs. Surely an Oxymoron?
The Guardian Newspaper. (and you can take it from this that they will not be one of my preferred media partners either!) Any national newspaper that doesn't have a decent sports page is just not worth the paper it’s printed on. Add to the fact that half of the blessed paper is .. well ... it's just boring. Only a very small proportion of the population want to know what's going on in the French Sahara or want to hear the views of some Guatemalan Tribesmen's Leader. I want to know what's happening in Hastings and Bexhill and Luton.
JJB Sports. I just refuse to wear a Burberry vest and baseball cap when I'm running.

So, I'll be firing a letter of to what I call my Top Ten Ron List Of Shame - that'll show 'em.

Anyway - I must dash. The Half Share in the House has promised to help me prepare for tomorrow's efforts with a rub down and her famous clench and wrinkle treatment. I'll let you know how I get on tomorrow.

Keep on tapering.


Ron